I am currently reading A long Walk To Water . This book is about two different kids living in the same place but at differe...
Thursday, December 5, 2013
Pass the Turkey Please!
Turkey
not only has a interesting name but awesome places to visit! The big country of
Turkey is 302,535 sq miles in total, it's main currency is Turkish lira and
language is of course Turkish.Down to the right is a building that is named The
Blue Mosque, a common Tourist attraction. In Turkey there is a majority of
Muslim and Sunni there is about 7 million people in Turkey . The capital is Ankara. The main industry is mining and oil
production. This country suffers from some server earthquakes since it is on
the plates of earth. Farming is also one of the industry in the country raising
sheep , And growing tobacco and olives.
To be blunt, it is rushed and unformatted. It does have a lot of information though. I think you should add some of other elements into the writing. I can see it manufactures oil and olives, but the writing does not end with a question. A way of organization could be to group the governmental facts first, then agricultural and trade next. I also think the writing should talk to the reader, ask more questions or maybe just spend a whole sentence in text.
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ReplyDeleteTo be blunt, it is rushed and unformatted. It does have a lot of information though. I think you should add some of other elements into the writing. I can see it manufactures oil and olives, but the writing does not end with a question. A way of organization could be to group the governmental facts first, then agricultural and trade next. I also think the writing should talk to the reader, ask more questions or maybe just spend a whole sentence in text.
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